In which I think unwanted thoughts.

I miss the way we used to talk like best friends. I would fully forgive you, if you apologized, maybe. I just don't think it'd feel right, you know? I mean, what you did, that was harsh. What you did again, and again, and what you said. That was just cruel. Forgive and forget. That's what Jesus would do. We try to be like him, but you don't care, so I guess it doesn't matter. I really hate that I keep thinking about you. Cause, you know, I don't WANT to! I mean, I'm just thinking all like, "oh, lookit, snow...." and BAM! You. NO! I don't want to remember. Not like we'd talk all that much anyway. I mean, me and you still? Please. Even SHE was pissed. That's saying something. I mean, really. HONESTLY. And then! To throw all of your life away like BAM! Doing this! BAM! Doing that! Why?! I guess I could point a finger, and blame you, but I made choices too, bad ones. And they effected aall of us. I guess I'm sorry. Is it too wrong to feel at blame for what you can't exactly see a connection to? I mean, and I just having such a high opinion of myself that I think I may have had something to do with this? Or, what if not? Would my taking your side, or talking to you, forgiving you earlier, made a difference? I can't even think in a straight line. I try to make this seem one direction and it curves out of place. Gosh. Do I miss you? Do you miss me? I'll never know, neither will you. You didn't show up, by the way. Not that I actually expected it, but still. I guess. It would have been nice....

~Just a side note~
Why am I most comfortable in everybody else's business? I think cause I don't want to be in my own. But then why do I have to tell you all about it? I don't. It makes me feel better though. In a weird sort of way. Letters to no one, if you will. Letters to remain unopened, to never have their meanings revealed. To never be read. If you do, by any chance, happen to come across this, just know. I love you. Jesus loves you. And I'm assuming, you're here for a reason. Kinda like going to Wal-Mart.^^

-sigh-

Hm. Talking to Jesus. I'll try that one too. Too bad the idea came from the problem child. Good luck naming those kids, by the way....